CREATING HEALTHY FAMILY
DEFINING THE CORE VALUE
We are adopted into God’s family, so we intentionally create family and community wherever we go.
Ephesians 1:5, 2:19; Matthew 12:48–50; Galatians 6:10; Romans 8:15–16; 1 Peter 2:17; Acts 2:41–47
Healthy family has open and honest communication, creating a safe place to process and grow.
Ephesians 4:15; John 3:21; 2 Corinthians 4:2; Matthew 18:15-17
Healthy family encourages and cheers each other on. We celebrate one another and are not in competition with one another.
1 Thessalonians 5:11; Hebrews 3:13; Acts 15:32; Galatians 6:10; 2 Corinthians 10:12
Healthy family serves and mutually submits (is tenderly devoted) to one another.
Ephesians 5:21–33; 6:1–4
Having a presence-centered family culture brings strength and deeper connectivity. A family that prays together stays together!
Proverbs 22:6; Psalm 34:11; Deuteronomy 6:1–9, 11:18-21;
We do nothing out of selfish ambition or gain. Instead, we intentionally partner with others to seek mutual benefit in everything we do.
Philippians 2:1–4; Romans 12:10; Ephesians 5:21; James 4:1–12; Hebrews 10:24–26
In covenant relationships, we purposely grow our capacity to trust and be trusted as we empower and lovingly confront one another in order to live out who we truly are.
Matthew 18:15; Luke 17:3–4; Ephesians 4:15–16; 1 Corinthians 4:14–21; 1 Thessalonians 5:14; 1 Samuel 20
We are loyal, which is demonstrated most radically when people fail. We do not punish and abandon those who fail in order to save face or show we hate sin, but instead we commit to helping them be restored.
Galatians 6:1; Matthew 18:15; John 8:1–11; Psalm 141:5; John 21
We recognize and affirm that every person is valuable and powerful and we celebrate the best in people, despite our differences. We respond to people based on their God-given identity and the honor in our hearts, not their behavior or self-definition.
1 Corinthians 12:14–26; 2 Corinthians 5:16–17; James 2:1– 5; Philippians 2:3; 1 Samuel 24:1–10; Psalm 139:13–16; Romans 12:10
We believe in God’s design and instruction that loving, life-long marriage between a man and a woman is the healthiest and, ultimately, the only structure upon which to build a stable, thriving society.
Hebrews 13:4; Genesis 1:27–28; Matthew 5:32; 1 Corinthians 6:9–11, 18; 1 Thessalonians 4:3–5; Mark 10:1–12
DO NOT MISUNDERSTAND
Not all Christian communities are demonstrating healthy relationships.
1 Corinthians 3:1– 3; Galatians 6:1– 2; 1 Corinthians 4:14–15, 5:6
We all are unconditionally loved, cherished and valued by God, but this does not mean everyone has been given the same expression and measure of favor, position and authority. God gives favor and position as He chooses, and He honors those who faithfully steward what He gives. The body of Christ is most effective when we embrace this truth and maintain mutual honor for one another.
1 Timothy 5: 17–19; 1 Corinthians 12:18, 24–28; Ephesians 4:7–16; 1 Thessalonians 5:12–13
Those in leadership should not use their authority to be destructive, manipulative, or controlling.
Matthew 25:25–28; 1 Peter 5:1– 3; 1 Timothy 6:3–14; 3 John 9–11; 1 Corinthians 3:12–13
Honor is demonstrated through consistent respect in word and action toward those we lead, follow, love, and disagree with. While honor avoids controlling others, it also lovingly confronts, limits, and disciplines when necessary.
1 Corinthians 13:1–7; Leviticus 19:15–18; Galatians 6:1–2; Ephesians 4:14–15; Romans 2:4; Matthew 18:15; Hebrews 12:11–14; 2 Timothy 3:16–17; Luke 3:10–14
People who have experienced broken marriages and/or families are not disqualified from greatness, as Jesus is more than able to forgive and restore them into healthy, holy families and communities. To receive healing and restoration, there may be a need to extend and receive forgiveness.
1 John 1:9; Romans 8:1– 3; John 4: 1– 42; 1 Corinthians 6: 9– 11; 2 Corinthians 5: 16– 17
We honor people whether or not it is convenient, but this does not mean we are to always honor their actions.
Romans 13:1– 8; 1 Peter 2:12– 20, 3: 8– 9; John 13:34–35, 4:5–42
We do not always have to agree with everyone or have the same opinions. However, we must value and honor each other, even when we disagree.
Ephesians 4:1–4; Romans 14:1–23; Acts 15:30–35; 2 Timothy 4:11; Philippians 2:3–16; Romans 12:4, 10; 1 Peter 2:13–17, 5:5–6
We recognize that it is possible for someone to behave their way out of the community, so sometimes it is unwise and unsafe for a community to extend accessibility in the same way that God does. Extending grace involves setting clear and firm boundaries. In certain instances, extreme boundaries are healthy and necessary as exemplified in Scripture.
Ephesians 5:11; Romans 16:17–19; Titus 3:9–11; 2 Timothy 3:1–6; Matthew 18:17; 1 Corinthians 5:4–6; 1 Timothy 1:18–20
PERSONAL APPLICATION
Jesus explicitly created us to live in community; people are most alive when planted in a healthy family of believers. Genesis 2:18, 1:26–28; Acts 4:23–35; 1 Corinthians 12:21–27; Psalm 133:1; Ephesians 3:14–20
The way we love people is a direct reflection of our love for God. John 13:35; 1 John 4:20; Proverbs 14:31; Matthew 10:42, 25:34–40; Hebrews 6:10
Love for ourselves, which springs from God’s great love for us, is vital in truly caring for others and creating healthy families. Matthew 22:37–39; Romans 12:3; Ephesians 5:1–2, 28–30
We draw from the Holy Spirit’s gifts and graces in the whole family of God, not just from those in leadership. It is important to honor every part of the Body, not just the visible parts. Romans 12:4–10; 1 Peter 4:10–11; 1 Corinthians 12; Matthew 10:41
Every believer is an important part of the Body of Christ. We celebrate their individuality, make room for their gifts to be expressed, and empower them to express those gifts in their spheres of influence. 1 Corinthians 12:4–31, 14:26; Romans 12:3–8; Ephesians 4:7–16; Matthew 10:41
We are responsible to speak up with loving confrontation when others in the family of God sin. We can remind them of the truth that, as a new creation in Christ, they are too amazing to be behaving that way.
Matthew 18:15–17; Galatians 6:1–2; Luke 9:54–56; 2 Corinthians 3:16–18, 5:17, 7:9–10; Ephesians 2:10; Philippians 2:13; Psalm 139:14
If we sin or make mistakes, out of love for God and our community we must take responsibility for our actions, repent and reconcile with those affected.
Matthew 5:23–24; Hebrews 4:15–16; 1 John 1:6–10; James 5:1; Luke 19:1–10
Forgiveness is our standard; everyone is given the opportunity to rebuild trust in the community.
Ephesians 4:32; Matthew 18:21–35; Luke 17:3–4, 23:34; James 5:16-20
We love people even if we do not receive anything from them in return.
Romans 5:8; Matthew 5:43–48, 25: 40, 45; Proverbs 14:31
We regularly ask God to help us see the people in our lives as He does and to encourage them with the truths He tells us about them.
2 Corinthians 5:16–17; 1 Corinthians 14:3–5; Matthew 16:17–19; Judges 6:12–16; Ephesians 1:18
We love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us.
Matthew 5:43–48; Luke 9:54–56, 23:34
Some people need to belong before they believe. Rather than judge people outside the church, we love, serve, and speak life to them, hoping that they will soon embrace the truth of Father’s love.
John 3:17; Romans 2:4; Mark 2:13–17; 1 Corinthians 5:5–13; Matthew 10:8; John 3:1–17, 7:50–51, 19:39–40
We honor the future generations and desire to see them prosper and do greater things than we have done.
John 14:12; Deuteronomy 31:14, 23; 2 Kings 2:9–14; 1 Chronicles 22:5–11; Acts 2:38–39; Matthew 19:13–15
We are adopted into God’s family, so we intentionally create family and community wherever we go.
Ephesians 1:5, 2:19; Matthew 12:48–50; Galatians 6:10; Romans 8:15–16; 1 Peter 2:17; Acts 2:41–47
Healthy family has open and honest communication, creating a safe place to process and grow.
Ephesians 4:15; John 3:21; 2 Corinthians 4:2; Matthew 18:15-17
Healthy family encourages and cheers each other on. We celebrate one another and are not in competition with one another.
1 Thessalonians 5:11; Hebrews 3:13; Acts 15:32; Galatians 6:10; 2 Corinthians 10:12
Healthy family serves and mutually submits (is tenderly devoted) to one another.
Ephesians 5:21–33; 6:1–4
Having a presence-centered family culture brings strength and deeper connectivity. A family that prays together stays together!
Proverbs 22:6; Psalm 34:11; Deuteronomy 6:1–9, 11:18-21;
We do nothing out of selfish ambition or gain. Instead, we intentionally partner with others to seek mutual benefit in everything we do.
Philippians 2:1–4; Romans 12:10; Ephesians 5:21; James 4:1–12; Hebrews 10:24–26
In covenant relationships, we purposely grow our capacity to trust and be trusted as we empower and lovingly confront one another in order to live out who we truly are.
Matthew 18:15; Luke 17:3–4; Ephesians 4:15–16; 1 Corinthians 4:14–21; 1 Thessalonians 5:14; 1 Samuel 20
We are loyal, which is demonstrated most radically when people fail. We do not punish and abandon those who fail in order to save face or show we hate sin, but instead we commit to helping them be restored.
Galatians 6:1; Matthew 18:15; John 8:1–11; Psalm 141:5; John 21
We recognize and affirm that every person is valuable and powerful and we celebrate the best in people, despite our differences. We respond to people based on their God-given identity and the honor in our hearts, not their behavior or self-definition.
1 Corinthians 12:14–26; 2 Corinthians 5:16–17; James 2:1– 5; Philippians 2:3; 1 Samuel 24:1–10; Psalm 139:13–16; Romans 12:10
We believe in God’s design and instruction that loving, life-long marriage between a man and a woman is the healthiest and, ultimately, the only structure upon which to build a stable, thriving society.
Hebrews 13:4; Genesis 1:27–28; Matthew 5:32; 1 Corinthians 6:9–11, 18; 1 Thessalonians 4:3–5; Mark 10:1–12
DO NOT MISUNDERSTAND
Not all Christian communities are demonstrating healthy relationships.
1 Corinthians 3:1– 3; Galatians 6:1– 2; 1 Corinthians 4:14–15, 5:6
We all are unconditionally loved, cherished and valued by God, but this does not mean everyone has been given the same expression and measure of favor, position and authority. God gives favor and position as He chooses, and He honors those who faithfully steward what He gives. The body of Christ is most effective when we embrace this truth and maintain mutual honor for one another.
1 Timothy 5: 17–19; 1 Corinthians 12:18, 24–28; Ephesians 4:7–16; 1 Thessalonians 5:12–13
Those in leadership should not use their authority to be destructive, manipulative, or controlling.
Matthew 25:25–28; 1 Peter 5:1– 3; 1 Timothy 6:3–14; 3 John 9–11; 1 Corinthians 3:12–13
Honor is demonstrated through consistent respect in word and action toward those we lead, follow, love, and disagree with. While honor avoids controlling others, it also lovingly confronts, limits, and disciplines when necessary.
1 Corinthians 13:1–7; Leviticus 19:15–18; Galatians 6:1–2; Ephesians 4:14–15; Romans 2:4; Matthew 18:15; Hebrews 12:11–14; 2 Timothy 3:16–17; Luke 3:10–14
People who have experienced broken marriages and/or families are not disqualified from greatness, as Jesus is more than able to forgive and restore them into healthy, holy families and communities. To receive healing and restoration, there may be a need to extend and receive forgiveness.
1 John 1:9; Romans 8:1– 3; John 4: 1– 42; 1 Corinthians 6: 9– 11; 2 Corinthians 5: 16– 17
We honor people whether or not it is convenient, but this does not mean we are to always honor their actions.
Romans 13:1– 8; 1 Peter 2:12– 20, 3: 8– 9; John 13:34–35, 4:5–42
We do not always have to agree with everyone or have the same opinions. However, we must value and honor each other, even when we disagree.
Ephesians 4:1–4; Romans 14:1–23; Acts 15:30–35; 2 Timothy 4:11; Philippians 2:3–16; Romans 12:4, 10; 1 Peter 2:13–17, 5:5–6
We recognize that it is possible for someone to behave their way out of the community, so sometimes it is unwise and unsafe for a community to extend accessibility in the same way that God does. Extending grace involves setting clear and firm boundaries. In certain instances, extreme boundaries are healthy and necessary as exemplified in Scripture.
Ephesians 5:11; Romans 16:17–19; Titus 3:9–11; 2 Timothy 3:1–6; Matthew 18:17; 1 Corinthians 5:4–6; 1 Timothy 1:18–20
PERSONAL APPLICATION
Jesus explicitly created us to live in community; people are most alive when planted in a healthy family of believers. Genesis 2:18, 1:26–28; Acts 4:23–35; 1 Corinthians 12:21–27; Psalm 133:1; Ephesians 3:14–20
The way we love people is a direct reflection of our love for God. John 13:35; 1 John 4:20; Proverbs 14:31; Matthew 10:42, 25:34–40; Hebrews 6:10
Love for ourselves, which springs from God’s great love for us, is vital in truly caring for others and creating healthy families. Matthew 22:37–39; Romans 12:3; Ephesians 5:1–2, 28–30
We draw from the Holy Spirit’s gifts and graces in the whole family of God, not just from those in leadership. It is important to honor every part of the Body, not just the visible parts. Romans 12:4–10; 1 Peter 4:10–11; 1 Corinthians 12; Matthew 10:41
Every believer is an important part of the Body of Christ. We celebrate their individuality, make room for their gifts to be expressed, and empower them to express those gifts in their spheres of influence. 1 Corinthians 12:4–31, 14:26; Romans 12:3–8; Ephesians 4:7–16; Matthew 10:41
We are responsible to speak up with loving confrontation when others in the family of God sin. We can remind them of the truth that, as a new creation in Christ, they are too amazing to be behaving that way.
Matthew 18:15–17; Galatians 6:1–2; Luke 9:54–56; 2 Corinthians 3:16–18, 5:17, 7:9–10; Ephesians 2:10; Philippians 2:13; Psalm 139:14
If we sin or make mistakes, out of love for God and our community we must take responsibility for our actions, repent and reconcile with those affected.
Matthew 5:23–24; Hebrews 4:15–16; 1 John 1:6–10; James 5:1; Luke 19:1–10
Forgiveness is our standard; everyone is given the opportunity to rebuild trust in the community.
Ephesians 4:32; Matthew 18:21–35; Luke 17:3–4, 23:34; James 5:16-20
We love people even if we do not receive anything from them in return.
Romans 5:8; Matthew 5:43–48, 25: 40, 45; Proverbs 14:31
We regularly ask God to help us see the people in our lives as He does and to encourage them with the truths He tells us about them.
2 Corinthians 5:16–17; 1 Corinthians 14:3–5; Matthew 16:17–19; Judges 6:12–16; Ephesians 1:18
We love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us.
Matthew 5:43–48; Luke 9:54–56, 23:34
Some people need to belong before they believe. Rather than judge people outside the church, we love, serve, and speak life to them, hoping that they will soon embrace the truth of Father’s love.
John 3:17; Romans 2:4; Mark 2:13–17; 1 Corinthians 5:5–13; Matthew 10:8; John 3:1–17, 7:50–51, 19:39–40
We honor the future generations and desire to see them prosper and do greater things than we have done.
John 14:12; Deuteronomy 31:14, 23; 2 Kings 2:9–14; 1 Chronicles 22:5–11; Acts 2:38–39; Matthew 19:13–15